The Age reported this morning that former Tasmanian premier David Bartlett has called on the Labor Party to overturn marriage laws that prevent gay marriage, even by Australians in countries where same-sex marriages are legal. The call came after Bartlett’s half-sister, Angela Borella, was prevented from marrying her partner in Portugal. Here, Angela tells her story.

I met her earlier this year in Indonesia. She is Portuguese. I am Australian. We knew after ten days that we never wanted to be apart, so when my medical volunteer contract ended in Indonesia six weeks later, I flew to Portugal to be with her and we now live in Lisbon.

These feelings are not new to anyone who is utterly, completely and deeply in love.  The only difference is that in Australia we are not free to marry each other under the existing Federal law.

We are not legally allowed to make this formal commitment to each other in front of our friends and family.

Given that we are living in Portugal, we were lifted by the fact that the Portuguese Government granted marriage rights to same sex couples in 2010. We started planning our wedding for early 2012.

We contacted the Civil Registry Office who informed us that all I required was my birth certificate translated in to Portuguese, my passport and a Certificate of No Impediment (CNI) from the Australian Government. It sounded so easy, so simple. We were ecstatic. We were going to get married, at least legally recognised in her home country, if not mine.

Last week, we walked in to the Australian Embassy in central Lisbon on a high. We were full of excitement about the future ahead and fulfilling our plan. When the Embassy worker disappeared from the counter for nearly 20 minutes, I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach that all might not be so easy, so simple.

She returned, awkward, sheepish and apologetic as she informed us that she was unable to supply me with a Certificate of No Impediment because we were a same sex couple.

My feelings immediately dissolved in to sadness, embarrassment and shame. I had never felt more de-valued as an Australian citizen.

A Certificate of No Impediment is a simple document to prove to the Portuguese authorities that I am not already married in Australia. It is a two-page document, costs $90 to obtain and five minutes of your time. The Australian Government issues CNIs to heterosexual partners as a matter of course.

But it says that CNIs are not issued to same sex couples because our marriages are not recognised in Australia. This is nonsense. The Certificate of No Impediment is an internationally accepted document that has nothing to do with the validity of my marriage in Australia.

The decision by the Portuguese Government to allow marriage between people of the same sex is a matter entirely for this nation.

The failure of the Australian Government to issue us a CNI impedes greatly on our relationship here. For example, I am unable to access certain entitlements like health care unless I am married. I’m also concerned about my partner. What about her right to enter a marriage with the woman she loves? After all, we are living in Portugal, not Australia.

A vote of conscience at the ALP National Conference in December simply won’t be enough to end the discrimination. It needs to become formal party policy that is binding all Labor Members of Parliament to vote for changes to the Marriage Act.

I would like my relationship to receive the same recognition that other loving couples receive.  I would like to be able to marry my beautiful partner in front of our family and friends and celebrate.

For us, this is so much more than just receiving equal treatment under the law. This is also about receiving equal treatment and respect by society for our loving and committed relationship.

For the original article published on the Punch website, click here